Presence: Paying Attention, Showing Interest

Strong leadership starts with presence. Dr. Louise Lambert explores why paying attention, showing genuine interest, and being fully present can strengthen trust, wellbeing, and team performance.

| Written by Dr. Louise Lambert

Most managers think they are good listeners and they probably are. They care about their teams, ask questions, and make time when they can. And yet, one of the most common complaints employees have about their managers is not about workload or pay, but feeling unheard, unseen, or unimportant. Notice the key word there?

They “feel” unheard. This gap does not come from poor listening (unless it does!), or a lack of goodwill: it usually comes from a lack of presence.

Presence is not about how much time you spend with people. It’s about how psychologically available you are while you’re with them. And from modern life to our corporate offices, presence among the hundreds of distractions around us has become one of the hardest leadership skills to maintain.

Attention is the new signal of respect

When people feel listened to, they don’t just feel informed. They feel respected. When they don’t, they often interpret it as disinterest, dismissal, or lack of care, even when that was never the intention.

At work, attention has become the new gold. Meetings are stacked, notifications are constant and managers end up being half-present in multiple places at once. The result is that people learn quickly whether they have your full attention or only a portion of it. And that perception matters, it signals how important others are in your eyes. When you give someone your full attention, you signal that they matter. When you don’t, you signal that something else matters more.

How presence affects wellbeing and performance

Many managers think they can listen while checking emails, glancing at messages, or typing notes. What they often miss is that people notice these behaviours immediately. And over time, people stop bringing things to you unless they absolutely must. It’s not because they don’t trust you, it’s because the interaction feels more effortful than it should and the returns are less than expected.

In short, presence affects how welcome people feel to speak, think, and contribute. When managers are distracted, people shorten their comments, avoid asking questions, or withhold concerns, leading to misunderstandings, errors, and missed opportunities for excellence and growth over time. In contrast, when managers are mentally present, people share relevant information sooner and leave interactions feeling they got what they needed and were heard.

Showing interest is not about being enthusiastic

Showing interest means being responsive at a minimum and curious at best. For instance, you can show interest by asking a follow-up question, reflecting what you heard, or acknowledging someone’s effort. It shows up when you remember something a team member said and refer to it later. These moments tell people that they are not just another item on your agenda.

As a manager, your presence carries more weight because of your role. When you are distracted, people often assume it’s because they are not important, not because you are busy. In fact, your team members are constantly scanning you for cues about their standing, performance, and value: don’t have them guessing.

What presence looks like in practice

Presence does not require long conversations; instead, it requires purposeful attention. You can decide that during one-on-one meetings, feedback conversations, team get togethers, or difficult discussions, you won’t not multitask. This means closing your laptop, putting your phone notifications on “silent” and facing the people speaking. You can even say, “I want to give you my full attention, so give me a moment to shut my phone down.” Even 10 minutes of full presence is more effective than thirty minutes of divided attention and people notice.

Another is to slow down your responses. When someone finishes speaking, pause and nod before replying. This signals that you are considering what was said rather than reacting automatically.

A third is to ask one genuine follow-up question. Not to challenge or redirect, but to understand and expand on what they are sharing. Questions like “Can you say a bit more about that?” or “What’s been hardest about this?” invite depth without taking much time and signal, “I am interested in what you have to say and who you are as a person.” Conveying such positive regard is wellbeing.

What managers often underestimate

Many managers believe presence requires time they do not have; yet, taking the time to slow down, listen, notice, ask questions and pay attention save time by reducing misunderstandings, rework, and emotional friction. In fact, many managers find that presence reduces the number of problems that reach them at all.

Others think such acts of respectful engagement are too small to matter; but take them away, and all of us have had the feeling of being a burden, an additional stress to someone’s day, unimportant or not being heard. It slowly diminishes us and drains the goodwill and motivation we once had to do good work. Once that is gone, it’s hard to get it back again. These actions may be small, but don’t let that be the reason you think they are inconsequential.

This month, try this

For the coming month, treat your attention as an important leadership behaviour. It’s true, you are busy and it won’t or even be possible everywhere but find one daily interaction during which you can strive to be fully present. That means no multitasking, rushing, checking to see if that email came through… Just listen, reflect, and respond.

A final reminder

Often, the most powerful thing you can offer your team is your attention. Paying attention and showing interest are daily behaviours that shape trust, wellbeing, and performance. When timelines are tight, tasks are plentiful and stress is high, it is the smallest thing you can do to yield a better outcome. Try it yourself and see what happens.

Like what you read? Contact us for how you might have Dr. Louise come to your organization and share these behaviors on a larger scale.